Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Table for 4?

Okay......here's my latest observation.

Getting your kids their own table in a restaurant.

Is this the newest yuppie thing?

If it is it drives me crazy (as do most things that yuppie soccer moms do).

I have noticed that if a yuppie couple come in with their two blond haired perfect children, instead of getting a table for 4 like you would expect, mom and dad sit at one table and THEY GET A SEPARATE TABLE for the kids. (and I'm talking 5 and 6 and 7 year olds). Little kids.

I have seen it over and over and over again (I eat out a lot).

And I've seen it in nice restaurants as well as fast food places.

What is up with this?

Any help here?

(Yuppies drive me crazy and self-centered uber-parenting soccer moms are the worst offenders.)

Monday, April 27, 2009

I wish I could sleep like my dog.

I love my little dog.
She is such a good girl.
She's totally laid back, nothing bothers her.
She loves all her squeaky toys (although Mr. Quacky is her favorite).
And she is so relaxed and stress-free it is just amazing.
I WISH I could sleep like that little dog.
She puts herself to bed and just...goes to sleep.
She sleeps like a rock.
She doesn't wake up in the middle of the night.
She doesn't toss and turn.
She isn't restless.
She doesn't snore.
She just sleeps.
(NO, Not like a baby because a baby wakes up every two hours and cries.)
She just sleeps.
Deep, relaxed, undisturbed sleep.
Man, I wish I could sleep like that dog.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

At least now I can get some new nail clippers

After a few weeks of negotiations, hubby told me last night that if I wanted to go to Las Vegas for a week, I could. The deals are just too good to pass up.
I am soooo happy and I am ready to go anytime. I think it will be fun and I KNOW I need to get away from here for a while. I have been sick for two weeks, I'm bored and I need to get away.
I have to make my reservations, I just haven't figured out exactly what day I can leave. Unfortunately, hubby has a doctor's appointment on the 4th which is when I would like to go. Maybe I can get someone to drive me to the airport on that day. I don't know.
I am going to stay at Circus Circus and do the Cold Cereal Tour...eating Huevos Rancheros and playing Keno at the Pink Pony, walking over to Slots-o-Fun and playing the nickel slots at 7:00 in the morning. It will be fun and a week to just be by myself (as much as you can be by yourself in Vegas....) I am definitely looking forward to going.
And I MUST buy a new "Las Vegas" souvenir nail clipper (it's a long story.)
I have to get back to the Circus Circus web site and figure out when I can go.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Where do I go to get some better genes??

Here's the deal.
I have got this figured out.

It doesn't matter what you do.
You can exercise.
You can stay active.
You can watch what you eat.
You can think young.
You can feel young.
You can act young.

But when you hit 60...you genes kick in and there is NOTHING you can do.
You cannot fight DNA.
You are at the mercy of your genes.

If you have good genes, lucky you.
You'll stay thin.
You'll stay alert.
You'll stay active.

If you have crappy genes....You might as well face it.
You are living in a house of cards and it will all collapse around you.

Unfortunately for me, I have crappy genes.

In the end..you ARE your DNA and there is NOTHING you can do to change it.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

On a happier note...

Okay...all of the griping about CrazyFriend is enough.
We know she's off her rocker.

So, some happier things to mention.

I guess Spring is officially here because Scout (our hummingbird and his family) has arrived. I put the feeders out last week, in anticipation of his arrival and sure enough he showed up a couple of days ago. I'm always glad to see him and his family.
I even built a planter last fall just for Scout so he could have some flowers. I stopped at Home Depot yesterday afternoon and bought some pretty little plants. Hubby helped me and we got them planted yesterday evening after dinner. They look very nice and I am sure Scout will enjoy them. Next week, we'll get a couple of hanging baskets.

I tried to play a little bit of golf yesterday. I managed to get in 4 holes. It wasn't so busy but there were 4 teenage boys ahead of me and they were just screwing around. They really didn't know what they were doing and they were taking forever to play one hole. I finally got tired of waiting on them and I quit after following them around for 4 holes.
I really just went out there to buy a golf club that we spied in the used golf club bin. It is a 60 degree lob club. Hubby and I split the $10 because it's such a specialty club we won't use it that much. I got it and tried it out. it's a neat club, if I can ever figure out how to use it! Right now it feels like I am trying to hit the golf ball with the side of a cast iron skillet!

Easter? Oh yeah, it is Easter. Everything is closed, I suppose but it is a beautiful day. Cookie our little dog is pretty active this morning and I think she'd enjoy a walk in the park. So we are going to get some Subway sandwiched and drinks, go out and have lunch in the park and then take her for a nice long walk. She'll enjoy that and we'll get to enjoy the beautiful day.

Okay, that's the good news.
At least everything doesn't revolve around Crazyfriend and her universe of delusion and denial.

Bye bye..coffee time.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Please get angry with the right people for the right reasons.

Okay..it's happened again.
Another fit of righteous indignation.
I just wasn't up to it so I called her on it and of course, CrazyFriend got mad at me.
It's just another episode in her life that is spinning out of control to the point where she is trying to grasp at controlling (however inappropriately) the few things that she is still able to control.

Last week, we drove to Augusta, GA (right exactly where the Master's is being held). No problem. Augusta is not far from here and it is not an unpleasant drive.
We went there to take CrazyFriend's precious 50 year old camera to a camera repairman who specializes in repair and restoration of old film cameras.
No problem. We dropped the camera off but only after a long discussion of what would happen to the film that was stuck in the camera. I suggested that the film would just have to be sacrificed in order to repair the camera (It's that "Greater Good" thing....).
Crazyfriend said she was okay with that but if it was possible she'd like to have the film saved. Okay, no biggie. The man was very nice.

Well yesterday I called Crazyfriend just to say hello and she what was going on. She had gone to Augusta to pick up her camera. And she was beside herself. She told me she was positively "LIVID" (her words.) She was ranting and raving about how unprofessional and sloppy and inconsiderate that camera repair guy was (she loved him when we dropped the camera off). She said she was afraid to even try the camera and she didn't even know if he'd repaired it properly (I mean she was on a TEAR!)
So I said well..exactly what did he do that was so awful and tacky and sloppy and unprofessional??? I mean this was a very nice man in his 60's with a very nice little office and a narrow niche of a business (and a very nice web site))
What was the big deal? He returned the WRONG ROLL OF FILM WITH HER CAMERA.

She ranted and raved, saying that she thought he was acting funny and slightly suspicious when she picked up the camera.
So I couldn't take it. I called her on it.
I wasn't going to be supportive and sympathetic.
This man seems to be an honest small businessman who probably made a perfectly innocent mistake. He didn't deserve this.
SO.........I said "Look..this is ridiculous. This man had absolutely NO reason to do anything with your precious film (which probably has 50 pictures of the neighbor's cats on it. Just CALL him and tell him there was a mix up. It is not worth this kind of rant and this is ridiculous." She hung up on me.

Go figure. CrazyFriend has a con man living in her house who is driving her cars and spending all her money and she doesn't get angry enough to throw him out. But she can go off on a major tear about a perfectly innocent businessman who made a simple mistake.
She can go nuts if her french fries are overdone or if there is a dead possum in the road.

But the BIG stuff?
She can't confront it.
Give me a BREAK here, Crazyfriend.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

It Wasn't The Lunch, It Was The Company.

Well, I tried, I really did but it was pretty much a lost cause.

Yesterday was CrazyFriend's birthday.

I couldn't spend a lot of money but I had planned on taking her out to a really nice lunch and give her a small birthday present.

But her life is becoming such a disaster, we couldn't even enjoy her birthday.

She has agreed to look after her "friend's" elderly, sick dog.

The dog can't stay at home with her owner anymore for a variety of reasons so CrazyFriend is trying to take care of the dog at her house.

The dog has to be walked every 4-6 hours.

And the dog has to be taken care of and fed.

And Crazyfriend is trying to do it all.

By getting up at 4 a.m. every day.

And taking care of her cats.

And going to the gym at 6 a.m. three days a week.

And catering to her abusive, passive-aggressive, freeloading "boyfriend". (A homeless, jobless, manipulative con man who is living in her house, driving her cars and spending all her money).

And doing everything else in between.

It's getting rather sad.

We met yesterday at 11:30.

CrazyFriend showed looking like something the cat coughed up.

She was disheveled, exhausted, barely able to put together a coherent sentence.

Her hair was a mess, she was wearing jeans and a rumpled shirt and the old windbreaker that I bought her at the Goodwill Store for $2.00.

She could not make a simple decision, even about where to go to lunch.

I gave up on the expensive lunch idea and we went to a nice little sandwich place.

I have her my sorry little birthday gift and then she went on back home to walk and feed the old sick dog.

It was very sad. A very sad state of affairs for a vulnerable, gullible, naive 60 year old woman who only a year ago inherited a beautiful house, 3 cars and close to 7 figures in cash and assets. Now she wants to get a job at WalMart.

Then later last night, she called to tell me that the car that has been a money pit for the last 4 years needs a new $3300 transmission.

Happy Birthday, Crazyfriend.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Felony French Fry Smuggling...

Well, okay I did it.
I admit it and I am not sorry.
I went to my favorite burger place (Five Guys) this afternoon for lunch and I smuggled in McDonald's french fries.
My husband was worried that the French Fry Police might catch me and arrest me.
But they didn't. I got away with it and I'm glad I did.
Here's why:
I LOVE Five Guys burgers.
They are yummy and my favorite lunch.
The problem is with their french fries.
Their fries are very good BUT they cost $2.29.
That changes my $5 lunch to an $8 lunch.
Plus they give you entirely too many.
The serving size is HUGE.
Now, that is great if you are there with someone to share but if you're by yourself, there is no way you can eat all of them.
I decided to try smuggling in a small order of fries that I could enjoy with my delicious burger.

It worked very well but I had to be discreet.

I went to McDonald's and got a 99 cent order of fries.
Very small. very tasty.
I took them out of the McDonald's bag and carefully wrapped them in a napkin and slipped them into the pocket of my jacket. Zipped it up.

I ordered my burger, sat down in a quiet corner.
When I got my burger, I simply took the fries out of my pocket (yes, they were still warm..)
And I proceeded to eat them quiet happily along with my delicious hamburger.

It was perfect.
I had just the right amount of fries and I was VERY happy.

YES... I am guilty of Felony French Fry Smuggling and I'm glad I did it.