Monday, March 30, 2009

Ode to Corn

Corn, corn
Corn is your friend.
Eat it once,
You'll see it again.
Corn corn.
Corn is your friend.
What goes in
Comes out in the end.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Cook it longer, it'll taste better.

Here's the deal.
I went to the commissary Friday and bought some instant oatmeal to have for a snack when I wake up at 2 o'clock in the morning instead of grits.
Well, I didn't like it at all.
It tasted powdery and yucky.
I tried it twice and was very disappointed.
I was going to just toss it.
Well, hubby took the trash today and I didn't put the oatmeal in the trash to throw away.
And when I got home, I started thinking about it.
Maybe....maybe I just wasn't cooking it long enough in the microwave.
So, I mixed some up and stuck it in the microwave for 90 seconds instead of just one minute.
And I let it sit for a minute or two before I tried it.
And guess what??
My oatmeal was fine.
It tasted good.
So now I have a snack for 2 in the morning.
I'm glad I didn't throw it out.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Brain Dead Zombie

Brain dead Zombie

Brain dead Zombie

I'd rather be a Body dead person

Than a Brain dead Zombie.

Friday, March 20, 2009

I just can't talk to you right now.

I'm sorry.
I am exhausted and I just can't take it anymore.
I have been patient, I have been understanding.
I have been forceful, I have been direct.
I have been brutally honest.
But yesterday finally put me over the top.
I'm just too tired to keep this up.
I give up.
I am not doing this anymore.
I need a break.
It's too hard and too exhausting and too pointless.
Nothing is going to change.
I just can't talk to you right now.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Cooking Class for Perfect People

Okay... I went to a cooking class last night with CrazyFriend.

I agreed to go simply because it was the anniversary of her mother's untimely death and I thought it would take her mind off the series of unfortunate events that took place two years ago.

No problem.

How benign can a healthy cooking class be?

Well, unannounced to me it was a cooking class for Perfect People who lead Perfect Lives and have Ideal Jobs and Stellar Credentials.

Let's see.

The cast of characters:

The Gym Owner, A very petite, very perky Type A personality. Chin length dark hair, not an ounce of fat on her body.

The Chef, Younger brother of the Gym Owner. CIA trained chef, world traveler. Dark hair, dark eyes. Charming and funny Lived in Italy, knows his way around the kitchen.

The Amazon, recently hired gym instructor. Muscular, tall, attractive blonde. B.S. in Exercise Physiology, Masters in Kinetics and Exercise. Looks to be about 24 years old. Slightly tight low rise jeans, white tank top. Great arms. She could probably bend you into a pretzel.

The Nutritionist, PhD. in Nutrition, Consultant. Tall, blonde, perfect body absolutely FLAT stomach. Grey cashmere sweater, perfectly matched dove grey dress pants. Flawless silver accessories.

Now...who ARE these people and what space ship did they fly in on?

This was the menu:

Homemade Granola (made from dried seeds, nuts and berries. soaked in spring water and mixed with low fat Greek yogurt.)

Sweet Potato Fritter made with Garnet sweet potatoes and pecans.

Freshly Chopped Slaw made with scallions, peppers, jicama and a freshly pureed dressing of pineapple, mangoes and lime juice.

Vegetable Lasagna made with undrained, unrinsed, al dente whole wheat pasta, freshly sauteed spinach and mushrooms, freshly grated Italian cheese and homemade freshly cooked tomato sauce with organic tomatoes.

And they enthusiastically advocated the fifteen regular people in the group (who all had that deer-in-the-headlights look) to make this stuff at home.

Now I'm sorry. The food was okay. Not great (undoubtedly great FOR you) but pretty unrealistic unless you are one of those PERFECT PEOPLE who was teaching the class.

Give me a break.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Kashi, Who are You Kidding??

Well, I went shopping last week and was trying to find something different and convenient to have for my dinners.
I bought one of those Kashi dinners that they have been advertising so heavily on TV.
They looked really good.
So I bought one.
A Mango Rice and Veggies casserole.
Now it WAS very yummy and I thoroughly enjoyed it BUT...
And here's the BUT;
It was about a cup of rice, a couple of tablespoons of black beans, some julienne carrots, a little corn and some mango chutney.
I figured it up and it was probably about 30 cents worth of ingredients.
It was yummy and it was convenient but there was no way it was worth the $3.15 I paid for it.
And that was at the commissary.
No way.

So....I got a bee in my bonnet and made some of my own this morning.
I cooked a cup of rice, julienne carrots, a handful of frozen corn and half a can of black beans.
I added some chipotle seasoning and mixed it all together.
(I didn't have any mango chutney).

For about $1.00 worth of ingredients, (maybe less) I made 3 servings of basically the SAME stuff.
Mine tasted every bit as good.
I am very pleased and although I liked it, I will NOT pat $3.00 for a measley little serving of rice and beans, Kashi or not.
That's it.
We have 3 SOLID days of rain and I am about to go stir crazy.
I HATE it when I can't get out and do stuff.
I am ready to tear my hair out.
I keep thinking that I could go to the gym but I can't seem to get back there, even after 6 years of going loyally 3 to 6 days a week.
I just can't make myself go anymore, even though I know I should.

So I don't think hubby wants to do anything (he rarely does).
I guess I will take the trash to the dump (Yay). It won't take itself.
And then I will go to Wally World and maybe to the Goodwill Store.
I don't really need anything from either place and going to the gym would certainly make more sense and be more benficial but I can't seem to go.'ll be lunch somewhere, Wally World and the Goodwill Store.

I HATE this lousy weather.
It just makes me miserable and unhappy and crazy.

Oh....BTW just because I want to LOOK at something, explore my options and discuss the possibilities doesNOT necessarily mean I want to do anything right that red hot second. The only way I can figure out exactly what I want is to look at different things and figure out different options. Jeeeeeeeezzzzz.

CrazyFriend is up to her old tricks, She has put herself in yet another untenable situation and is running herself ragged trying to do things to help and please everyone else while the wheels are falling off her life.
So what else it new?
That's it, The weather SUCKS and I hate myself and want to die.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Praying in Restaurants

Praying in restaurants and dressing like idiots.
Interesting the kind of things you notice when you're just killing time and trying not to be bored senseless.
I went into town for a little while today, just to attempt to maintain my sanity.
I stopped at Five Guys (my favorite place for a really good $5 lunch).
Even the though it was a Sunday, it wasn't terribly busy because of the awful weather we've been having and I couldn't help watching the people who were there.
Saying Grace In Restaurants:
I don't know about that.
Do you have to hold hands and pray out loud?
I mean grace is nice and all but is it absolutely necessary when you are out at a restaurant?
Maybe it's just me and my cynical views of religion but holding hands and praying out loud over your hamburger just seems to be overdoing it a little.
I don't know.
Dontcha think God KNOWS you're grateful for your $3 hamburger.
Don't make a big deal of it.
And how stupid can people be about the way they dress?
Now keep in mind we have had two solid days of cold, nasty, wintery rain.
Not a drizzle, a DOWNPOUR, turning to sleet with gusty winds.
I couldn't help noticing at one table there was a mom and two daughters.
The daughters looked about 14 and 11.
The mom was dressed reasonably for the cold nasty wet weather.
She had on a turtleneck, a warm jacket, jeans and boots.
The girls, on the other hand were bordering on absurd considering the weather we have been having.
The older one had on tights, a tiny little skirt, a long sleeve light weight T-shirt and little strappy shoes with kitten heels.
The little sister had on a little short skirt, a light weight sweater and sandals.
What happened there?
Did the daughters insist on the totally inappropriate outfits?
DId mom say "Okay if you wear that, you are going to freeze, so don't complain?"
Then another group came in.
Two grown men wearing nothing but dress slacks and dress shirts.
Pouring winter rain, wind and 38 degrees.
Didn't you look outside before you left the house?
Don't you believe the weather forecast?
And a lanky teenage boy in a T-shirt and shorts and unlaced tennis shoes that looked two sizes too big.
And then the coup de grace.... a grown man walking in wearing a T-shirt, a black nylon jacket and those GOD AWFUL pajama bottoms that lately everyone seems to think are okay to wear in public.



Just a few idle observations while I was trying to kill a couple of hours to maintain my sanity...and have lunch.