Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Cooking Class for Perfect People

Okay... I went to a cooking class last night with CrazyFriend.

I agreed to go simply because it was the anniversary of her mother's untimely death and I thought it would take her mind off the series of unfortunate events that took place two years ago.

No problem.

How benign can a healthy cooking class be?

Well, unannounced to me it was a cooking class for Perfect People who lead Perfect Lives and have Ideal Jobs and Stellar Credentials.

Let's see.

The cast of characters:

The Gym Owner, A very petite, very perky Type A personality. Chin length dark hair, not an ounce of fat on her body.

The Chef, Younger brother of the Gym Owner. CIA trained chef, world traveler. Dark hair, dark eyes. Charming and funny Lived in Italy, knows his way around the kitchen.

The Amazon, recently hired gym instructor. Muscular, tall, attractive blonde. B.S. in Exercise Physiology, Masters in Kinetics and Exercise. Looks to be about 24 years old. Slightly tight low rise jeans, white tank top. Great arms. She could probably bend you into a pretzel.

The Nutritionist, PhD. in Nutrition, Consultant. Tall, blonde, perfect body absolutely FLAT stomach. Grey cashmere sweater, perfectly matched dove grey dress pants. Flawless silver accessories.

Now...who ARE these people and what space ship did they fly in on?

This was the menu:

Homemade Granola (made from dried seeds, nuts and berries. soaked in spring water and mixed with low fat Greek yogurt.)

Sweet Potato Fritter made with Garnet sweet potatoes and pecans.

Freshly Chopped Slaw made with scallions, peppers, jicama and a freshly pureed dressing of pineapple, mangoes and lime juice.

Vegetable Lasagna made with undrained, unrinsed, al dente whole wheat pasta, freshly sauteed spinach and mushrooms, freshly grated Italian cheese and homemade freshly cooked tomato sauce with organic tomatoes.

And they enthusiastically advocated the fifteen regular people in the group (who all had that deer-in-the-headlights look) to make this stuff at home.

Now I'm sorry. The food was okay. Not great (undoubtedly great FOR you) but pretty unrealistic unless you are one of those PERFECT PEOPLE who was teaching the class.

Give me a break.


garnett109 said...

I don't know but I think those Garnet sweet potatoes sound great!

salemslot9 said...

maybe, a bit intimidating
at least you
made the effort, though